Silence in the Heart!

Ever felt the silence that prevails inside ur heart?
A feeling that stands stagnant admist the chaos?
A pinch that makes u feel that words are a pain....
A pain....u've long felt n bred on!

Surprisingly, i used to feel it quite often earlier.....
I think i off-late had started over looking it...
n suddenly today....ive been re-acquainted to my old friend...
A friend who,  i thought, brought me peace!

i some how now, have realized my world other than people
whom i gave the importance they hold today!
Ive come face to face with my reality...
that i had long forgotten drowning in bliss!

The happiness i hold in my heart....
as if is my treasure...
a treasure i thought i cld share...
a treasure i realize, nobodys interested in!

the people i held as the center of my world,
were ppl who demanded their freedom....
People, who after being freed look at me with inquisitive eyes!

I know that not every choice i make is my own....
I do what people want me to do!
N im forced to often wonder....
Why am i to bear its consequence there after??

N after all that drama, I manage to find peace in fate...
forgetting that this chaos wasnt mine...
but admitting that it now is a part of my life!

With all the hyper energy around me,
I am reminded, that I am responsible for my peace....
Even if others interfere!

I may sometimes dim the spotlight on others....
focusing on the self now
for i have just realized how important i am to myself....
that there will b no me....if im not taken care of!

Ive learnt through time to let go of things
that dont want to be a part of my world....
I am learning to expect less from others...
I am starting to appreciate the beautiful Silence that my heart holds!

Lifetime......

life is actually a tale comprising of the ppl who let u down during the various stages of ur life!
there are no possible methods to move on from pain....
there are only new faces and new reasons to feel pain!!
the moment u let ur guards down fr an individual.....
they take great pride in hurting u.....
they get into ur life assuring happiness...
finding all the possible loopholes ur emotions may portray!
every emotion of love that u experience for a person.....
is like an unopened present!
u nvr know whts behind that lovely wrap!
the more u unveil it....the more u get distured...
for even if its nothing like wht u gifted.....widout expecting nething in return....
It was sumthing ud expect to c the least!!
i donno why is it such a recurring incidence....
as if each time u learn....ur made to realise, uve left out another chapter!
however small a thing may it b that u expect frm another....
disappointment is wht ud meet wid!
irrespective of the kind of person u r....
irrespective of wht u give out!

the biggest mistake a person can ever do....is to luv sumbody more....
for they get more chances to hurt u n to make u bleed wid the bluntest of knives!

one doesnt req to be good in conveying their feelings....
for the other person, is blissfully deaf.....n blind!
ud always b blamed to be inconsiderate.....
ull always b the person who creates the scene!

 i really wish there was a way to feel less pain....
a way where we dont let ppl just enter our heart n squeeze it!!
for it just doesnt feel fair....
that in such a short life span.....a heart has to go thru all this pain!! 

thoughts

ive always believed that its a persons beliefs that make a character....

it sets the standards fr people to knw their line!

but many a times ive seen myself fail in putting across my point

in making ppl acknowledge the seriousness of my principles!

i knw attimes i may not completely justify asserting my beliefs,

but it hurts me to accept that ppl change their wrds n im made to live wid things that are against my beliefs!

i just cant accept this defeat!

i may attimes be graceful about their feelings n not make an issue

but i cant deny that i feel hurt!

the only thing that crosses my mind is wht if i too repeated wht they did to me

....changed my wrds n later made up by being upfront n say its btr on face than behind their back!

i knw i need to look past these small issues......

but i often wonder....wld others too b that gracious?